Alhamdulillah, few days pass after Syawal and I am most grateful able to complete the 6 days Syawal fasting even though it was last minutes. Hehe.. I am grateful that Im doing it with happiness, full of spirit to be love by Allah SWT, to improve myself and there were urge that I must do it eventually or I left with regrets and sad feeling. Alhamdulillah with Allah willing, help and guidance I able to finish it. What a big talk for a simple ibadah, yet it is a happiness for me that I want to share without intention to boast. Amin.. May I sincere in my ibadah and may it lead me to His guidance.
When my Ramadhan this year I was blessed with mum visit, the Eid was celebrated by myself. huhuhuhu.. My aunties ask me to join them during Eid yet I feel more comfortable to celebrate at my own house. I am thankful for their invitation that sincerely care for me as their family, I reply by saying InsyaAllah even-though I am grateful and happy it was only 50-50 my heart want to be there as I am someone that tooooooo much in love spending time in my own house. Other than that It will not comfortable with the few non mahram in my auntie house, plus the house need a long travel from my house. So the last day of Ramadhan I decided to celebrate Eid in my own house, rationalize that I will visit auntie later in that month.
The last day of Ramadhan, I plan my day for the Eid. I ask my neighbor if the small Mosque nearby will do Eid prayer. They say yes and it will start around 8am. I sleep early and set the phone and alarm clock for subuh. I wake up early do my subuh prayer, citing Al mathurat and Al quran before decided I will continue sleeping for a while. I set up another alarm clock to wake me up later.
During my short sleep, I dream that I already wake up and doing ablution when I finally really wake up on time hearing the alarm clock. My eyes were open but keep on heavy with sleepiness. I gather my energy to go for breakfast and feel the happiness of Eid. It was 7.00am when I rush to bath. I unusually spend more time bathing and then preparing my dress for raya. 7.30pm I am ready to go.
I went to mosque and arrive about 7.40pm sitting and hearing the imam gives khutbah for the Eid. When it ends, then all the people shake hand, wishing Eid and say goodbye. That means I miss the Eid prayer!!! With full of regrets, fault, guilty, sad. I blame myself for being late and not prepared early. It was true that I come early before 8pm, but that was not the actual time. Since it was my first time, I should take precaution and comes early.
I went to the shop nearby to buy vegetable and bread when I met an auntie asking me why I am late. I told her the whole story before back home. While walk I keep thinking if the Eid prayer can be done at home alone. Alhamdulillah after googling about that matter I just know that we can do the Eid prayer alone at home. I cheer-up again and went to read the book regarding solat sunat and learn how to do the Eid prayer. Without wasting time, I perform the Eid prayer and ask forgiveness from Allah SWT that I always forgetful, wasting time and I hope He gives me hidayah to be a good Muslim.
I call back home and tell my part of stories to sis. I told her to not tell mum about I did not able to do Eid prayer at mosque. That because if mum know, I would be in a great risk to hear a free public speaking. I have learned and repent my mistakes and improve myself in the future. hehehehe... =P
After that I sent Eid wishes to my teacher, family and friends and then change my whatsapp status to "selamat hari raya, maaf zahir dan batin/ Happy Eid, forgive me body and soul". In hoping whoever I know will forgive my lacks, mistakes and anything bad I have done. Hehe
So ya all, Selamat Hari Raya, Maaf Zahir dan Batin. =))
- My old drafted eid post. hehehe ^_^
- Eid prayer can be done at home. Learn it, so if you face same situation as mine you still can do eid prayer without regrets. InsyaAllah.